Feeling on edge
So why "Faith's Edge" for the title of this blog. Well, I guess it is more of a feeling than anything else. The feeling I've had for the past year and a half. The feeling of being pushed to the edge of what you believe. The feeling of standing on the edge of a chasm waiting to swallow you up. The feeling of being pushed (intentionally or not) to the fringes of religious traditions: not reformed enough, not Presbyterian enough, not emergent enough, not black enough...
Right now there is an episode of The Simpsons on where biblical stories are being parodied. They should call this episode seminary. (Or maybe just San Francisco Theological Seminary)Doesn't matter, right? Those stories are all myths anyway, true? I miss the feeling of certainty I had before I came to seminary. I suppose it was a false sense of certainty at best. From the edge I can see the faith I used to have. I know I can't go back. I know it is being changed, but I can't see where it is going. Is this where I'm supposed to be? Not understanding? Rebuilding my faith from scratch? Constantly feeling uncomfortable? Sleepless?
The people I respect the most are the ones who have the most questions, not the ones that have the most answers. Maybe that's where I'm headed. I want to use this space to expore the questions and maybe to figure out how I'm going to live my life in light of the unanswerable. Like any lenten journey, the edge leads to the cross...
Right now there is an episode of The Simpsons on where biblical stories are being parodied. They should call this episode seminary. (Or maybe just San Francisco Theological Seminary)Doesn't matter, right? Those stories are all myths anyway, true? I miss the feeling of certainty I had before I came to seminary. I suppose it was a false sense of certainty at best. From the edge I can see the faith I used to have. I know I can't go back. I know it is being changed, but I can't see where it is going. Is this where I'm supposed to be? Not understanding? Rebuilding my faith from scratch? Constantly feeling uncomfortable? Sleepless?
The people I respect the most are the ones who have the most questions, not the ones that have the most answers. Maybe that's where I'm headed. I want to use this space to expore the questions and maybe to figure out how I'm going to live my life in light of the unanswerable. Like any lenten journey, the edge leads to the cross...
